So you’re in your twenties and it’s a pretty fragile time. Through your teenage years (mostly your late teens) you figured out what type of a person you really were – what your likes and dislikes were, what your true personality was like and what you wanted for the future. Of course you don’t know how you’re going to end up but maybe you have a slight idea of where you want to be. If you are feeling a few ) it doesn’t have to be all of the points I have listed, I just wanted to tell you I have realized it’s a very normal thing. And you have to find it in you to trust yourself, love yourself and believe in yourself to make sure you stay true to you and who you really are.
Having a panic attack because you’re still single.
You’re panicking because you haven’t found the love of your life. All your friends are getting engaged – in fact it seems to be the new thing to announce on social media!
But you know what..
Be happy for all your friends – as yes, it is the age where people will be getting engaged and married here and there. But remember – it is at their own time. Every one takes different paths. Every one meets people at different times in their life. It’s just like University – sometimes we all start (searching or expecting) around the same time but just like people graduate after others or go on to their masters and other levels of education, the game of love is unexpected and totally dependent on you and your life path. So don’t fret – everything has its own time. But – be happy for your friends that are engaged or moving forward. It’s not to envy them its to repeat your own path and enjoy the time you get to spend with yourself!
You’re nowhere near on the way to becoming a millionaire in the next few months.
At this age we all have crazy energy and in turn ambition. Being an entrepreneur myself, I find myself setting particularly high expectations when it comes to six months and one year goals – whether it’s a million-dollar idea or taking over the marketing world. And we all do.
But you know what..
Slow and steady wins the race. We will make mistakes and learn from them. And there is always someone out there who can do it better at you – but the key is to take knowledge from other people and mix it with your own ambition to create the ultimate potion. You can’t pretend to know it all and Time is your only teacher. Sometimes we are impatient and get frustrated when things are moving slower than we expect but we have to use that time to soak everything in as much as we can – because the more thorough your learning process the more sustainable your success. Patience is a virtue but don’t stop waking up everyday and going out there to achieve even a tiny part of your goal – every building brick is important when it comes to building a castle!
One thing I do love about being overly ambitious (and sometimes unreasonable) is this naive belief that everything is possible.
Being Self-Conscious
There are probably a few things you doing like about your body image or appearance that you are feeling conscious about and try to hide.
But you know what..
Don’t over analyze yourself. We always see flaws in each other that no-one else notices. We are over harsh on ourself and we don’t appreciate the things we do have. I know sometimes you want to be different. But remember you are unique and special. I know everyone says that and sometimes you really may doubt that – but (apart from me thinking you are – honestly!) you have to take advantage of your strengths and work on your weaknesses. Yes, anything is possible. And you are so young and have a whole life ahead of you. So work for things you want. If you want to loose weight, then work for it. If you want to be “successful” then work harder than everyone else. If you want to perfect any flaw you think you have – the only way is to work on it. Remember begin beautiful/handsome starts from the inside. If you don’t love yourself no one else will!
Using Food as your best friend and worst enemy.
A lot of people turn to food as an emotional crutch or have a really bad relationship with it. I myself saw food as an enemy as I suffered from extreme guilt when I used to eat anything that consisted of carbs and often ate too little. On the other end of spectrum lies those who over eat (most of the time closet eat) to temporarily soothe emotional turmoil – using food as their best friend and go-to solace. Both of these extremes are bad. Whether you are obsessed with being ‘skinny’ or comfort eat, you are doing something wrong. Sometimes you may be doing it and not know.
But you know what..
For those who treat food as their worst enemy – no matter what size you are, you can get to your ideal size. Through my personally journey, I knew I was a unique person but I never felt satisfied with my weight as I knew it wasn’t idea. But through discovering a balanced lifestyle, I made food not an enemy but the key to a lot of my happiness when it came to enjoying things I love in moderation and enjoying life!
For those who use food as a crutch, address your feelings. What are you hiding from? Look your fears, sorrows and dismay in the face and deal with it. You are WAY TOO YOUNG to feel that life is that bad. Whatever you may be going through, there is always a solution to everything and the beauty about life is that it gives you so many chances to fix things and start over. So take advantage of that!
Placing too much ego, time and reliance on Social Media.
Social media and smartphones have taken over our lives. I know – who am I to talk – I have two companies that rely heavily on Digital Marketing and I have a blog. But the truth is we do spend way too much time on social media for the wrong reasons – stalking other people, living vicariously through others and being overly interested in other people’s live – celebrity or not.
But you know what..
Firstly – no one has a perfect life. Everyone out there filters what they post on social media. Everyone wants to look their best in front of everyone else. When someone has a fight with their spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend, of course they are not going to air their dirty laundry. But if they have a good hair day it’s out there! Of course I’m not being a hypocrite – I admire people who aren’t afraid to express themselves and are genuine when it comes to showing off talent, accomplishments, important life events and raising awareness to causes or their brands or passions. But don’t compare yourself to other people. Social Media is like a dinner party – everyone has their best dress and best make-up on. Applaud but don’t envy. Appreciate everyone and everything for what they are but make sure you spend your time in the REAL WORLD with REAL PEOPLE who are physically around you. Don’t waste your time texting when there are people right in froth of you. Appreciate your surroundings not your screen! It’s not important how many likes you get on a picture of how many friends you have. Yes you are your personal brand and if you have any brands you are promoting online, thats brilliant, but let it not define you!
Drinking a little too much.
We’re all guilty of it (well most of us anyway). A few (too many) drinks on a night out to be able to have easier conversations, hoping the crowd will get prettier and (temporarily) erasing any worries or stress you may have.
But you know what..
Drinking too much only leads to horrible hangovers (as you may have experienced) and not too fruitful a night. Generally, nothing productive ever comes from a night out unless you’re out with clients or moderately enjoying a few glasses with good company and good conversation. Appreciate early mornings and have a few friends that “aint about that life” because at the end of the day, getting wasted only leads to hangovers, damaged organs, possible mistakes and next day depression. Be balanced. Enjoy a drink for the taste and whats in it. Savour it and limit it. You can enjoy an evening without ruining the next day. Of course – we all have to go through the young and reckless craze but if I was to give any advice, it only leaves you feeling less content and a little more lost. Focus on addressing and stress or problems that arise. Learn to find content in a limited number of drinks and focus more on who you’re with and reality. It’s a great lesson 🙂
Always wanting to be around other people.
Many people are scared to spend time with themselves. Either it’s fear of loneliness or the feeling that if you’re not socializing you aren’t popular.
But you know what..
You are your best friend. Spending time with yourself lets you learn more about the person you really are without social pressure and influencer and helps you grow your inner peace and happiness. Once you are at peace with yourself, only then can you be content and achieve happiness with others. Find something you love to do that doesn’t involve relying on other people (for me it is writing and inspiring other people, as well as my two businesses). The older we get, the smaller our circle is. Its not about quantity it’s quality. Surrounds yourself with a few good people and remember – if you walk away from a social engagement / meeting not feeling wholesome or like you have benefited in some way, you’ve wasted you time. Have a large network but small circle – and social media friends and likes don’t mean anything unless thy translate into physical friendships!
These points have been based on my personal past experience and I hope many of you could relate in some way to them. I would love to hear your thoughts!